Caring for the Most Vulnerable

During the month of April, thousands of advocates, elected officials, mental health providers, private child care agencies and volunteers came together across America to wear blue, plant blue pinwheels, release blue balloons and a myriad of other visual activities in observance of National Child Abuse Prevention Month.

To say child abuse/neglect is a problem in our nation and in our communities is a gross understatement. In fact, across the Commonwealth of KY it is increasing! Issues surrounding poverty, addiction, familial dysfunctions and mental health all contribute to the rise of abuse and neglect among the most vulnerable of society...our children.

Organizations like Buckhorn Children & Family Services have done an incredible service to the communities and States in which they serve by raising awareness and creating a sense of urgency for advocacy through their various outreach initiatives. Organizations like the Moyer Foundation(c) strive to break the cycle of violence, abuse and neglect and strengthen families through partnerships with local agencies like ours and the public school system. Buckhorn Children & Family Services is happy to come alongside other private child-care agencies, advocacy centers, the Moyer Foundation and the KY Department for Community-Based Services to treat those affected and eradicate this ill that haunts so many children in our midst.

For over 114 years, Buckhorn has been in the business of protecting children and helping families and we pray that the Lord will continue to bless us as we live out our mission. Times are tough financially but our children are worth the fight. The children and youth that come our way are more survivors than they are victims. They have survived the worst of the worst and have fought the "Goliaths of the dark" and somehow found their way to us.

When I see our children, I see beauty, talent, gifts, skills, potential and future hope. I am proud of our children and their tenacity and resiliency. If they can survive and get to us then we must provide them with all we have and our best practices in healing and providing hope.

What do we offer? We offer residential services to provide a therapeutic environment to children and teens that deal with highly aggressive behaviors, substance abuse, self-harming/mutilation, sexual reactivity and post-traumatic stress disorder, we also offer services in therapeutic foster care/adoption and in-home family preservation and reunification. Our latest achievement will be to implement Camp Mariposa(c) in Wolfe County to help children, ages 9-12, break the cycle of family addiction in June 2016.

As National Child Abuse Prevention Month draws to an end and one-by-one we take up the pinwheels planted in honor
the abused children in our care/community, we at Buckhorn Children & Family Services remain committed to do all the good we can by providing a sanctuary of health, healing and hope.

Enjoy the artwork created by two of our residents!

Just a Cup of Coffee

We each have such a unique and valuable role to play. And our voice, when used, can make an impact that we never imagined.

Just recently, I had coffee with someone I’d never met before. We chatted for a good 30 minutes about this and that, and I asked a lot of questions about her. But, after a bit, I could tell that she wanted to hear more about me, what I do, and what Buckhorn Children & Family Services is all about.

To be honest, since I explain Buckhorn to people so regularly, I often feel like I’m boring to listen to, and forget that it’s a fresh message to each new person who hears it. So I told her about our kids. I told her about the challenges of being in a remote region of Appalachia KY and the unique challenges that presents with hiring licensed clinicians and raising money. I shared that it takes $250 a day to care for a child but we only get $218 from our payor sources, which translates into us having to raise an additional $800,000 annually just to break even. I told her into addition to the money we have to raise to break even, we are trying to raise $11 million to do capital improvements, fund our recreation program and start an endowment to assist with our clinical and program services.

Well, after sharing briefly the Buckhorn story, challenges, the year we were about to complete and dreams for the future, she hesitated and said, “Well, I was abused when I was a kid. You’re only the second person I’ve ever told – and the first person was just last month. I want to help you help your kids because I suffered in silence and never got a chance to be a Buckhorn kid. I'll be a champion for your cause!”

Her eyes immediately began to well up and she told me more. My eyes began to tear as her story reminded me of the 1400 stories I read of our children who have graced our doors in 2015.

You might think that she needed me, my voice, and the Buckhorn story in order to tell hers. And, yes, I suppose that’s true – obviously, since I’m only the second person she’s ever told, she shared her story with me due to the role I have with Buckhorn.

But the truth is that I needed to hear her story. I needed her to be bold. I needed to see her eyes well up. I needed the emotional pull because I needed to be reminded once again of why I go to work every day. I needed to be reminded that it’s okay to be bold when I ask for money on behalf of my kids because it is for them we fight.

Hearing her story and sincerity was affirming and was just what I needed at just the moment I needed it. And if that wasn't enough, shortly after our meeting I received the following notes from former children and youth who went through our program of treatment:

• I just wanted to reach out and let you guys know that you most assuredly saved my life when I was a teenager and came to you for help. Because of the values you instilled in me, I am healthy, married and have three kids. I am raising my children under the same values you taught me.
• Thanks for putting up with all my "craziness, insane thoughts, anger and temper." You guys really knew what you were doing in trying to help me. I am alive because of you and am doing well. I have a great support group and am in school. I hope to graduate soon and come work for you guys so that I can help kids like me.
• I thought I was a nobody until I came to Buckhorn. At first, I thought all this love, encouragement and God talk was just another way for somebody to take advantage of me but you really showed me that you cared. It was the first time I ever experienced real love, compassion and held accountable for my present and future decisions. I will always be grateful to Buckhorn.
• When I came to the Dessie campus I thought I would just stay there until I turned 18, but I quickly learned different. Because of the caring staff, of which I hated but loved, making me work the program and the teachers at the school encouraging me to complete assignments, I am now a high school graduate and a graduate of your program at Dessie! I am excited to go home and get a job and start a future I never thought would be possible.

It's amazing what can happen over a cup of coffee. She needed my voice, yes, but, I also needed hers.

Would you pray and consider what role you could play in the Buckhorn story? Would you be willing to lend your voice on behalf of our children?

Today We Weep

Today, we weep as an agency and family of the Buckhorn Tribe upon learning that a former client of ours committed suicide at fifteen years of age.

Today, we are reminded of the importance of our mission and ministry to those whom we serve and the critical role we play in their healing.

Today, we weep for the loss of this young life and all of the potential that could have been.  

Today, we are reminded of just how precious life is and the hope that tomorrow has for all the children and youth we serve.

Today, we weep as the adoptive mother thanked us for all we did for her child and shared that she wished her child could have stayed with us longer.

Today, we are reminded of just how important we are to the lives of those who enter our doors and the challenge that we have to daily plant seeds of hope into every child's heart and soul.

Today, we weep for the loss and deep void that the family is feeling and all the unanswered questions that most assuredly will come to their mind.

Today, we are reminded how important family is and how limited we are as humans, knowing that many of our life questions will go unanswered.

Today, we weep for the children in our care that still battle their dark places and monsters they have encountered.

Today, we are reminded that these dark places and monsters are not of their doing but the actions of others upon them.

Today, we weep for the children in our care whom we advocate for, treat, support, and love and encourage each day praying to lead them to a better path in life.

Today, we are reminded of how important each Buckhorn Tribe staff member is in providing a sanctuary of health, healing and hope.

Today, we weep for the children who are not in our care and are presently experiencing the dark places and monsters in their life on a daily basis.

Today, we are reminded that child abuse and neglect is something real and we must do all we can to prevent and treat it.

Today, we weep for a child welfare system that is broken and needs reform but is just being ignored as young lives are lost daily.

Today, we are reminded that we are compelled to be the “voice of those who suffer” and to be their champion for services and treatment.

Today, we weep for loss of life.

Today, we are reminded that even in death, other can be saved. Through the organ donation program, the lives of five children were saved.

Today, we weep because of what is presently before us.

Today, we are reminded that with the grace of God we can change tomorrow!

My 2015 Thanksgiving List

Last week I talked about the spiritual discipline of learning to thank God on a regular basis. Thanks-giving to God on a regular basis gives us another portal to maintain our spiritual wholeness--to maintain our joy, peace and faith (confidence) in Him. I believe that if you want to experience joy, peace and faith regularly and at a deeper level in life, add to your daily routine the act of simply walking in ongoing thankfulness. Demonstrating to God often that we are thankful for what we have, rather than what we don't have or maybe have lost, can be the difference in recognizing and experiencing all the blessings He has for us or not.

I also challenged my readers to jot down at least 15 things in their life they were thankful for, regardless of how big or small. I completed the exercise as well and thought I would share with you the things I have been praying through recently:

Personally, I am thankful for:

• My family and friends who make my life so rich with joy
• My wife who continues to demonstrate her love for me in innumerable acts of kindness and care
• My mother who is still going strong and finds time to shell and freeze peas for my family to enjoy throughout the year
• My co-workers who know how to share food and a laugh even when the work schedule is so hectic and overbearing
• The God-given wisdom of the human soul that knows, deep down, that God is, and that He is good
• The eternal and unchanging promises of God--that I am His and He is mine, now and forever
• That there is a sure day coming when I will know Him fully, just as I have been known, and I will see Him face to face

For my children at Buckhorn, I am thankful and hopeful:

• That on restless nights when they cannot sleep, they know that they are not abandoned or forgotten by the One who created them, who loves them perfectly and knows them perfectly
• That they know the stars shining across the night sky is a gift from God, sent to remind them of the vastness of the universe
• That when they don't know how to pray, God's Spirit intercedes for them with groaning too deep for words
• That they realize it is not their job to fix their parents/guardians or peers
• That they learn that life is short and long, sweet and difficult, all at the same time
• That they learn that we are not meant to understand everything
• That they learn that their past cannot define who they are or define their future unless they allow it
• That they are surrounded by selfless, committed and compassionate staff

The Discipline of Thanks

Thanksgiving is quickly approaching—the time we are supposed to express our thankfulness to God. The Scriptures remind us often of this truth: Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (I Thessalonians 5:18) and I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds (Psalms 9:1).

I wonder how many of us have thought about “why” we should be thankful to God? I’m not sure many of us have. I have a Facebook and Twitter account. I have many friends, colleagues and family with whom I stay in contact and follow through these social media feeds. All of us post pictures, share videos, rant and rave over the latest news or political issues, share recipes and invite people to events. Unfortunately, some use it to bully others, air their personal laundry, debate issues and call people out for their beliefs and/or political views. What I find missing in most of the social media feeds, including mine, is thankfulness, compassion and respect for others no matter how different or unique they may be.

For the last 18 months, I have been President/CEO of Buckhorn Children & Family Services. During this time, I have learned a lot about being thankful and depending on God’s care and provision. Hidden deep in the Appalachia Mountains is an invisible city of children and youth; the children and youth who reside with us do so because of severe abuse and neglect in their lives. Because of our geographical location, the only way for our ministry to be known is for us to be the voice and face of these whom we serve so that we can find additional resources to meet the needs of our children.

My staff and I have spent many a night praying for God’s provision, knowing that when the sun broke over the eastern sky the next morning, bills would be due and the bank account would be empty. Nevertheless, we held steadfast in our prayers, thanked Him for a century of service to children, and asked for one more blessing so we could serve another day. Each time, we would wake to find God’s provision and blessing!

I’ve been a follower of Christ for 42 years and in fulltime ministry for 24 of those years. As I look through these years, I realize that expressing my thanks to our Heavenly Father may be as powerful as any other discipline of the Christian life. Being thankful compels me to fix my eyes on God rather than on myself. It humbles me. It lifts my mind off of my troubles and anxieties and reminds me that God will always provide for my needs, and that for those who love God all thing work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).

As you approach Thanksgiving, spend time listing God’s blessings in your life. Don’t stop until you’ve identified at least 10-15 blessings. This exercise will force you to think creatively about God’s care and provision—even in the small things.